Life From Here, Back From The Dead, Update #100

100?…….100? Really?

Well….hasn’t this been Special! This was the first Nadir* weekend resulting from the chemo Taxotere since last year!

I still feel like Crap! And if you know…..you know that’s a good thing! Of any of the regimes I've been on, the only ones that have worked have been the ones that make me feel bad. My Mother knows, she’ll ask how I’m feeling and I’ll say “Like Crap” and she’ll say Good!

I’ve always felt that this was my part of the battle…endure feeling like I’m pregnant and have the flu for a few days.

During the Nadir weekend I have a lot of time for what I call “interior thought”. This is the time with yourself where you contemplate your fate, imagine your future, tell yourself the truth and cleanse your soul…..I’m glad to report………I’m OK!

I really hope it’s working, my PSA was very high (you don’t want to know) and the bone pain continues to be a nuisance. My hope is that the pain will recede once the chemo begins taking affect….it’s done that before. The Doc seemed more optimistic regarding the future than he was so we’ll see. As he said, it isn’t the PSA today that counts….it’s the one next time that is crucial….Next time is March 20th . I’ll need lots of Prayers and Energy that day!

The chemo Jevtana, the one I was on before, didn’t make me feel as bad but it made me feel less bad...all the time….and didn’t really work. So I’m curious to see what the next couple of weeks will be like cause I really don’t know what normal is supposed to be.

Probably the topic I’ve discussed most has been my struggle with eating. Protein is like a tonic for me…once I have some, I’m better immediately….it’s just getting that first bite in that’s hard. Every morning, just to get started, I get up and eat a white, sugar covered doughnut to get myself ready. (I know, we all love’em….but EVERY morning!).

Soy protein helps but just doesn’t do it the way good old animal protein does. Seafood of any kind, pork and beef…in that order, are the keys. Why doesn’t some one develop an animal based protein pill? They have pill forms for everything from Kale to Rye Grass but no shrimp enhanced “shooters!”.

I’ve watched a lot of TV over the past several days….What’s up with the History channel at night? Every time I tune in there are a couple of rednecks shooting alligators or others in neck deep water trying to fish with their hands…..have they never seen a hook?  I assume it's not the same water.


A great quote from a dear friend. Mothers, Daughters and Sisters, pay attention:

"Be the kind of
WOMAN
That when your feet hit
The floor every morning
The Devil whispers
“Oh Crap! She’s up!

Keep that Spiritual Energy and Prayers coming folks, we’re still in a fight!

*Nadir, is the lowest point of my blood counts after getting chemo. It usually comes on about 3 days after treatment and last for about 3 days.