Back From The Abyss...Again

Well…I’m back! My first nadir weekend on the new chemo, Jevtana. The good news is that I didn’t seem to go as far as in the past. I’ve read, and was told, that the side effects were less severe and I think they are…..of course, it’s all relative.

Unlike the Taxotere, the “discomfort” began on Friday….a day ahead of schedule. I’ve had so many different combinations in the past but this does seem to be milder, I just hope it doesn’t last longer…..Oh, and that it works! It’s kinda like, if you had a bad flu but not the worst…..If you didn’t have to go anywhere, you wouldn’t….but if you really had to go.....you could. ????

I’ve experienced more bone pain this time than in past nadirs. It’s not like “Crap! I bumped my damn elbow!” kinda pain. It’s more internal (which makes sense, that’s where the cancer is). You feel it rolling along your bone. In my minds eye, the reason I feel the pain during nadir is because the drug is down there kicking ass and taking names! Oh! And meet Mr. Tylenol!

Have you seen the ad on TV for Blue Cross Blue Shield? All you see are the backs of the legs and feet of a couple sitting next to each other humbly. The heels of the man’s loafers are tapping up and down nervously as the Doctor’s feet walk in and he says something like, “Well, we reviewed the scans and ran over this test and that, yadda, yadda…....and we can’t find any cancer!” Her foot touches his and their feet are slumped in relief.  Awwwww!
WHAT IS THIS?!……AMERICAN IDOL?!……WINNER AFTER THIS COMMERCIAL BREAK?! If my Doctor walked in with that report, the first words out of his mouth had better be “You’re cancer free!”.......or you’d see the backs of those loafers rising up as I go for his throat! Come on! BCBS, get real!

I usually get a lot of email responses after I post on the Blog….they come from everywhere, sometimes I don’t even know the person.…some are a little more weird than others....but believe me they are all treasured and savored........It’s interesting….I get more comments and responses when the news is good....people like good.  I can understand that, this is heavy shit!.....I don’t even know if I would want to be reminded once or twice a month about friend or loved ones’ health status…..unless it's always good...and then what's the point?

All in all...I'm Good!  If this stuff works and the side effects are no more than this, then I can stand it....based on this first treatment of course.  I know the protocol.....keep the patient alive and as happy as possible until something better comes along.  So it's a race, and I intend to win!

My Dad used to tell me "Never play pool or cards with somebody whose nickname is a city.
I guess none of us know which cards we’ll be dealt…. if we want to win, we play them the best we can..…if not…..we throw’em away.

Please don’t ever feel sorry for Me.….I’d rather you spend your time and energy praying for my ass!

Keep that Energy flowing Guys, I swear to God it helps!  B.